wanna be war hero (redone)

“Mum I wish the world was different don't you?”
“I wish the world was made of heroes and legends, a reality where I know I could do something and make a difference. Nothing I could do here would help anything, no amount of training, blogs or love would change anything.
They say you’re the most powerful when you’re fighting for something, to protect it, but what is there to fight for? Real strength comes from within, the yearning to save something but what do we have to save?
I wish our world was one where through guts, determination, bruises, beatings and strength I could change something, save something or someone.”
“Mum there’s this inevitable war coming that was forged through greed, hate and deception.
A horrible thing that destroys homes, countries and so, so many lives, yet why do I aspire to be someone who fuels it?
A soldier is a man with a gun, from a town like ours is taking lives for the sake of our country.
For many reasons this man fights
It’s for his land
It’s for his wife, his kids and his friends
It’s for family tradition
It’s to become a man
It’s for his religion
It’s for an adventure”

“Mum, as children I fantasized about being a soldier, we would shoot our friends with our hands and chickenfeed guns. Taking lives is a game”

“I think I will to I'll carry that gun through bullets and smoke while the cases drop and the blood spills. I'll wear my flag with pride the blood of innocence on my fingers will stain for my friends, my country and my love.
Why? The delusions of grandeur of a dreaming child? Because I wish in my life somewhere through my existence I could be a hero”
“Mum I wanna be a war hero!”

what your missing

Hello Geoffrey
It’s your son.
I’m in grade ten, and the best in my SOSE class.
Kym is in college and has failed her P’s twice.
I’m playing in the senior’s team for soccer
Everyone is bigger than me.
Yesterday I got dumped by my girlfriend
And jumped off a 17m high rock naked
Kym works at chickenfeed and earns hundreds of dollars a week
I work at Macca’s and don’t get paid enough.
So far I’m living and awesome brilliant life
And recently I’ve decided
That no more will I think about what has happened
No more sleepless nights pondering possible happenings
No more raging about that of what my father is
And finally no more fucking nightmares
And I don’t care that you’re missing out and I don’t care that you’re not in my life!



p.s this is a message i sent to my dad a few months ago
i used it in my latest english assinment and thought i might put it on here

pp.s don't ask

starlight

At this very moment I’m sitting outside on top of my neighbour’s roof, staring into the sky.
I’ve been thinking about doing this for a while, so after watching a few hours of anime and writing a little blog I ventured out, scaled the fence, layed down and for some reason this is one of the most amazing moments in my life. I knew this would be great but I never imagined I would feel so full or enlightened by this. I'm a very strong believer in that the best things in life are free. I’m very cold though. Gazing into this whirlpool of stars and lights is giving me the most amazing thoughts. It’s just that inspirational. All that's left now is to smile humbly and think about how insignificant I am, it’s ever so belittling. This is probably the most peaceful thing I’ve ever experienced. I could spend hours looking at these stars but I know in my mind this will last forever. There’s no noise, no wind or clouds its just perfect. I really don't want to go to sleep, I’m not tired but its 3.20am so I reckon I should. I’d rather just lay here enjoying this wholesome feeling.
I can tell from these moments of great happiness that my life is going to be amazing...

forgiveness

So I’ve been thinking so much about so many things lately and watching avatar this evening has helped me realize some things. People hold so many petty things against each other. A wise man once told me that learning to forgive is the hardest thing in life to do, but it will be the key to happiness in life. I'm beginning to figure it all out. I believe that through justifying peoples reason for doing something is the key to forgiving them. For example if someone does something wrong by you they must have a reason for doing so, by identifying this and then justifying it. It’s all to do with reasons. I know that I'm going to be a much happier person
I'd be happy for life to turn out with me as an wise man somewhere in between uncle Iroh and uncle Ned. Being a cheerful old guitar playing hedonist, what a dream? Always being able to forgive will mean that you can always love...

maths lesson

when sleep is bestowed nightmares come
the morning brings a gate of freedom
so when the time is brought that path i enter
this day now brings a chance for laughter






if only you knew the meaning



by simon and mitch

happy

I guess I'm happy well content last few days I've had new thoughts idea's on life I've decided to be happy enjoy my friends my schooling my everything because it matters choosing to be happy matters it makes a difference had a couple lets down and average days but choosing not to be let down by lame teachers people pissing me off I don't let those things to ruin my day anymore from now on I'm happy seeing the best in things you'll see me smiling in the sunshine feeling mellow gazing at the clouds

a typical goodnight

After a night of nothingness, besides watching episode after episode of Naruto and waiting for friends to reply.
I take my headphones off.
Close down MySpace and shut down the computer.
On my journey to the other end of the house
I stop at the fridge to get a glass of cold milk and a panadol for the pain in my legs.
I get to my room
put my phone on the charger
maybe send out a message to someone I know wont reply
the tinge of loneliness and cold speedily comes, I roll over and think.....
just think, about everything
all the conversations, my friends and the possibility's
I'm pretty sure everyone does the same thing exactly like I do
I dunno it just seems so special to me
thinking.....
I've been told I'm a thinker before
a friend wished she could be like a fly stuck on fly paper, to my thoughts and imaginations
I thought that very intriguing.
lying in bed waiting for sleep sucks
I'm afraid of sleeping
I don't know why, I just am
so lie there eyes wide open
thinking...
just thinking.......